What often frustrates and derails the spiritual student is the quandary of how to live all the things learned along the path. The purpose of this blog is not to ask anyone to change a belief but to help those who are intent in their pursuit of living in alignment with their beliefs to put those ideals into their real lives.
Wednesday, January 9, 2013
WHY IS CHANGE SO HARD?
Many have already abandoned
their New Year’s Resolutions.Why?Because change appears to be a hard thing to
do.Nowhere is that more prevalent than
in self-development and spiritual development programs.Or, it could be that it is more obvious
because one is paying attention.
In the Becoming Your
Spiritual Avatar program we begin by establishing what one’s core beliefs are,
developing operational characteristics of said beliefs, and then monitoring
thoughts, behaviors and emotions that are discordant with those beliefs.Then, using the Avatar methodology we
Now, in the past there were
numerous techniques used to try to figure out “why” one does what one does,
i.e. processing, past-life regression, hypnotherapy, etc. etc.What I witnessed for 30 years was all this
did was “tell a story” that let me off the hook.I did thus and so because my parents did thus
and so, or this happened to me therefore I do this, or I’m a Taurus what do you
expect.Then it was easy to settle into “well,
that’s just the way I am…..I understand now why I do what I do.”
As I have worked with the
Avatar aspirants for the past 2 years, as well as the work I have done for
myself and in my other counseling, I have found that there are 3 secondary
energies at work and all lead to a primary reason why change is so hard.
The secondary reasons are:
1)A deep seated belief in right &
wrong.If I change the way I
believe/behave now then everything that I have believed and done must have been
wrong, ergo I have been wrong.And
nothing is more abhorrent to the ego than being “wrong”.
honoring of an authority figure in one’s life – a parent, grandparent,
inspiring teacher, preacher, guru – and a deep seated desire to please them.This honored authority figure taught me to
believe/behave this way and if I change then I will be disrespecting them…..and,
Heaven forbid, they will be disappointed in me.
with current beliefs/behavior.If I
change the way I believe/behave then I won’t know who I am.I will feel exposed and vulnerable.
All of the above lead to the
primary reason why change appears to be so difficult.And that is,
A refusal to take
abject total responsibility for personal choices made.
“On no,” you say.“I most certainly did not choose [this] or
[that].There was nothing I could do
Well, here’s the point at
which one must stand up and be accountable.At EVERY nanosecond of Creation one has the ability to CHOOSE.And if one does not intentionally choose, one
chooses by default.Although we may not
be able to control the circumstance in which we find ourselves, we most
assuredly can control our response to that circumstance and how that effects
our presentation of self.
Human Beings were given the
great gift of Free Will, which allows us to exercise the right to choose.Unfortunately we have become so bogged down
in right/wrong, good/bad that we judge our choices, past and present.Sometimes we stand petrified and make no
choice, which is by default a choice in and of itself – we have just acquiesced
to what is in place.
We have also developed some
sort of belief that we only get “one time at bat”.That is, we believe once a choice is made it
is set in stone.The most magnificent
part of Free Will is that we are given the ability to “choose again”.As we progress in our spiritual growth and
our perspective changes, so too will what is the appropriate choice for
us.We must be willing to utilize this
extraordinary gift that has been given us.
Further, there seems to be
some sort of “finish line” philosophy wherein when I get it “right” then I can
quit and rest on my laurels.I won’t
have to keep changing.Well, I’m sorry
to have to tell you this….but Creation never ceases.Bluntly put, God keeps moving the finish
line.The entire function of the Isness
is based on constant creation, which means constant change.It would probably be a good idea to embrace
change as “the new normal” and find the adventure in it all.See yourself as an explorer of Life, ever
seeking what is new and wonderful, allowing that what has been must change in
order to discover what will be.
The new energies that are
here to support us are a great boost to anyone and everyone willing to activate
their Free Will and begin change through conscious intention.I invite you to join with me as we create our
lives in alignment with what we profess to believe and live in Love, Peace and
Let’s join together, have a
party and go see what’s out there!